Indians love to watch porn. Kerala has one of the biggest fan bases for a former porn star (Sunny Leone). But the truth is people don’t know the basics of sex. They think that real sex is like porn. I have clients coming to me for counselling before marriage to help them learn how to have good sex with their partner.  If porn could address this need, do you think they will come to me for answers?

Porn is unrealistic. It’s bad for sex. It’s made solely for entertainment. Sex education is not just about procreation. It involves body, mind, love and sex. Children should be taught about their body parts in an age-appropriate way from the age of five. If parents are reluctant to do this, schools should teach them.

People often ask me why I don’t call myself a counsellor, instead of a sex worker, now that I also provide counselling to people. I really doubt that’s going to make any difference to my identity. Sex-worker is a name, which the society has given me. And that name is going to stay with me even if I conquer heights. People in Kerala are quite good at reminding me of that. In my initial days as a sex-worker, I had to literally live like a fugitive. Even in public rallies and campaigns for social causes such as creating greater awareness on HIV/AIDS where the services of sex-workers are enlisted, many activists and intellectuals refused to share space with us.


My dream now is to build a house for sex workers who are old and are unable to earn. This will provide them with a sense of safety and security. I also believe it’s the best way to give myself back to the society.

NALINI JAMEELA is a former sex worker, best-selling author and most recently a state award winning costume director. 

(Concluded)

*In conversation with Sangeeth Sebastian, senior journalist and founder, Vvox, a digital health clinic. The series is a part of an AKADialog initiative to capture the lives of newsmakers.