Letters and embroidery allowed medieval women to express their ‘forbidden’ emotions

By Pragya Agarwal, Loughborough University

Medieval Europe was a place of great emotional incontinence. So much so that historian Johan Huizinga claimed: “Modern man has no idea of the unrestrained extravagance of the medieval heart.”

Crying was ubiquitous – especially by religious men and women, as writing and illustrations in religious texts of the time show. Women were not allowed to engage widely in holy intellectual pursuits such as writing and interpreting religious texts, so they could only channel their religious fervour and closeness to God through their bodies.

But though such displays of extreme emotions were accepted from religious women because it was seen as a sign of their devotion to God, it wasn’t considered acceptable for their lay counterparts.

In the medieval period, prescriptive literature warned women of the dangers of anger – one of seven deadly sins. Women’s anger was seen to confirm their inherent weakness and inability to control their emotions.

But while they were discouraged from expressing their feelings in daily life, letters written by elite women of the medieval period are a rich source of information about their emotions. Most upper-class women were educated and eloquent in their writing, and letters gave them the opportunity to express themselves and wield power, when they had little other means of exerting influence.

Surviving letters

Not many of these letters have survived. One that has was sent by Aline le Despenser, Countess of Norfolk, to the chancellor of England in around 1273. Women did not partake in official communication, so this was unusual. The letter is a masterclass in persuasion. It uses rhetoric such as “dear friendship”, which was mostly only used between male associates. But the countess had to write carefully and mostly stay close to the expected gender norms of appearing to be a decorous, obedient wife – a tight line to navigate.

In Renaissance Italy, the feeling of being powerless was palpable in many of the letters that women wrote.

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