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It’s hard to avoid comparing yourself to others. We all do it from time to time — at work, at school, with friends, on social media. But this act of constantly evaluating how you measure up can have a big impact on your mental health and how you see yourself.
Some tips to get you started on the road to self-love:
1. Pay Attention To Your Triggers: The first step to addressing any problem is understanding its root. If you’re battling a severe bout of self-hatred, it can be helpful to sit with that feeling and try to identify where it came from. You don’t live in a vacuum, so consider what could have prompted these feelings.
2. Challenge Your Negative Thoughts: Sometimes self-hatred pops up when you aren’t in a good place to journal or reflect. When this happens, try having an internal conversation with yourself. Don’t be discouraged if the positive side of things doesn’t win. Simply challenging these negative thoughts helps to reinforce the idea that self-hatred isn’t a fact or undeniable truth — it’s an emotion.
3. Practice Positive Self-Talk: Self-hatred often comes in a moment when you don’t have compassion for yourself. If you have a period where you’re feeling good, try to write out a list of what you love about yourself. Keep this list where you’ll see it every day. When the self-hatred thoughts come, stop, take a breath, and say out loud one of the items from your list.
4. Reframe Your Negative Thoughts: Reframing is a therapy technique that can be used to address negative thoughts and self-hatred. It’s usually done by simply shifting your thoughts to a slightly different perspective. It might involve thinking upsides of a bad situation or considering a frustration in a new light.
5. Spend Time With People Who Make You Happy: The best way to combat these negative thoughts is to spend time with our loved ones, whether that’s a friend, family member, or partner. Go for a coffee, see a movie together, or simply visit while taking a walk together.